Trail Ride FAIL

Josey's lovely lessee is out of a horse to ride because Josey moved with her momma up north this week :( When I knew Josey would be moving I asked if she might like to come out and love on Bre. She rode Bre back at the big arena and they got along great. She doesn't have a ton of technical experience but she has a really stable seat, long soft leg, and gentle hand. Bre is happy as can be with her up there. She called me to ask if she could take Bre for her first trail ride. I wanted to go but I also wanted to see if Romeo cold hanle Bre leaving so I decided to stay home. 

Romeo Fail: It is well established that Romeo goes crazy when left behind but I am always the one taking Bre so I haven't seen exactly what happens. I was hoping maybe he would be crazy then calm once she left. That wasn't the case. He got more worked up the longer she was gone. I was worried he would colic so I hand walked him. I need the exercise so I didn't mind. However, I am bummed that she can't take her for rides alone. Hopefully between Romeo's owner, Romeos Girl, and me there will always be someone to ride with her. 

Bre Fail: Bre's new friend did a great job getting her all pretty. She remembered everything I told her from the last time. She remembered that Bre loves a certain rubber curry and she is particular about her hind feet. She also remembered that Bre wears boots and asked where they were. To which I responded "Oh you are just walking it should be fine." I met them once on the trail in my car just to make sure that Bre wasn't balking her "Um, I don't go places alone anymore" spot but Bre seemed to know there wasn't a beginner on her back and they were already past the spot. Bre looked great. She had her big bouncy happy walk. When they arrived back I noticed a hink in her step and her rider said she had just started limping. Sure enough Bre had managed to half tear a shoe right off. AHHHHHH!! I went into panic mode because I used an out of town farrier for her. The nails were sticking out so if I couldn't get someone there I would have to take it off myself. I sent out some panicked texts for plan A), B), C), D), and E)......... Then just when my vet was helping me formulate a plan my farrier sent a text that he was two minutes down the road. Bre had literally walked past where he was trimming on her ride. YAY!!!! 

The day was salvaged and the only real loss was the fact that I was late for lunch with barn friends. Bre is getting pull on bell boots back on. I have kept them on her for the better part of a decade and every time I slack on this I am rewarded with a missing shoe. I have many memories of shoe searching in various weather conditions. Her farrier of three years has lulled me into a false sense of security because she keeps them on with him. I guess I won't win horse mom of the year.... 

And I am Riding (Even Breedle Dee)

I have been in horse heaven all summer with more horses than I have time to ride. For the last three years I have hardly ridden. I was taking prerequisites for nursing school then I actually got into nursing school. Before nursing school I moved her to a wonderful private home without trails. They put in an outdoor arena but it is fairly small so it his hard to do much in it with her big stride. And  frankly I just didn't have time. We could have had a huge private indoor with someone to tack my horse up for me and I wouldn't have been able to ride. I was worried that once I was done with school I wouldn't have a horse to ride to get in shape for Dickie. Boy I was wrong. 

Romeo's teenager has been busy with school and sports so I have been tuning him up. He has also needed a little retraining due to some misguided teaching. It has been super fun to ride him, come up with a solution, then teach it to his rider. I could teach her fine without me riding him but it has made the process go even quicker. I am so very impressed with her by the way. She learns quickly and is doing great things even when she doesn't realize it. What a relief that both of them are coming together. I can't wait to see them bring home some blue ribbons!!! 

My friend has the most adorable draft cross. She is draft/appy cross. She is half draft but not too bulky. Any of the bulk she has right now is actually fat (don't tell her that, we tell her she's sexy). She is arena green but has been ridden into the mountains and is so calm. She is just a joy to be around. However, she needs miles in the arena. She gets a little pissy when asked to trot, and wants to run into the canter. I think she has a ton of potential for dressage. Once she gets going she holds a lovely tempo. She just needs regular riding. I offered to ride her until she gets a good lease. It has been so fun!!! It has my creative riding juices going. I look forward to riding her and am sad when my ride is done. I can't wait to see how she progresses. 

 "I can smell the treats in your pocket. Mind sharing?"

"Oh s*$% my mom is getting tack out."

Last but not least, yesterday I got out to the barn early and the sun was shining. It was a wonderful warm fall day. I still had two horses to work with but I was running ahead of time. I looked at Bre and said "Why don't we go for a ride?" I just got a new(used) saddle that fits her like a glove. I have been dying to ride her since she got her Legend shot and acupuncture work. It was so fun!! I forgot how extra bouncy she gets when she has been adjusted. I think she loves the saddle. It was like I have been riding her all along. She was trotting around all stretchy and through her back. She wanted to get behind the bit a couple of times but this mare hasn't been ridden in a bit in at least a year. We had a better canter than I have had in years!! Yay for the Breedle. I really need to get someone to ride her regularly. She did great and seemed very happy about it. 

 "Um, there are apples back in the barn."

 "Am I cute? Can I have an apple?"

 "I didn't notice there was grass to eat in front of me"

"She won't let me go back and get apples, or get the grass in front of me. I guess I will pout." 

And Dickie didn't want me to forget about him. I had to put a picture in. How cute is he? He was trying to give me kisses where we were standing on a tarp. 

"I am just a little tiny baby. Cuddle me please."

Don't Fence Me In (Legend Follow Up)

Bre received her adjustment and vet visit just before I had a long stretch of work. I had decided in some stroke of insanity to work four 12hr shifts in a row so there was no way to get out and see how she is moving. All reports from the barn owner (her second mom) are that she looks great. Then Monday I recieved a text that she JUMPED OUT OF THE PASTURE!!! The teen leasing Romeo came to ride him and left her in the lower pasture. She usually just hollers for him and keeps eating until he comes back. They have done this many times over the summer. I think she was more offended that Romeo might be getting goodies in the barn than upset by him leaving her.

The fence in the back pasture is just under boob hieght for me (I'm 5'6") but there is a spot they have been leaning on so it is a little lower and wider. It is on a hill though without much of a runway. I decided that this means Bre is feeling much better and needs someone to ride her. I can't wait to play with her on Thursday!

Legend-ary

Today was the big vet/acupuncture visit for Bre and Romeo. To recap for those just tuning in Bre is my 14 yo quarter horse with a variety of difficult to pinpoint soundness issues. She has been solid for years now as long as I don't do consistent arena work. A little over a  month ago I noticed she was really off but the angle on her right front was wacky and I just assumed having the farrier out would fix it. As he was working on her I noticed how sore she looked behind when he was working on her front legs. 

Romeo

Romeo is Bre's boyfriend where she lives. He is a 6yo breed stock paint who has been rock solid on the soundness front. Unlike Bre, Romeo walks carefully places and takes care of himself when he gets the inevitable bumps and bruises of pasture horses. He has had a wonderful young lady leasing him and doing 4-H. Unfortunately, she was riding with an older teen who was teaching her some bad habits. She was learning how to slow him down to WP jog/lope by pulling from the front end and was keeping him in a tiny little stride without taking time to let him stretch and extend. When I got on him after show season I was disappointed with how stiff and choppy his stride was. I could tell he was uncomfortable in his back and hind. We decided to get his back worked on and I took over lessons for his girl. She is doing wonderful with him and riding him correctly actually seems more natural to her than all the crazy business. About a week ago his left hind started swelling and we finally found a day when we could both be there for a vet appt. 

The vet arrived today. I was thrilled that my equine vet has been trained for acupuncture. It always seemed like a disconnect to get body work from someone other than my vet. As part of the first visit she did a full once over on each horse. Romeo was first and she started by palpating the swollen tendon, his back, hips, etc. Then she had her assistant walk him to and from us on the pavement, then trotting. She was great about pointing out how his hips were moving unevenly so Erin could really understand what was going on with her horse. From there her assistant lunged him and we could see how short he was striding in the back. He was clearly more stiff on the right then the left. She felt that there was something going on in the hock. When she flexed his hocks he was clearly more off on the right. She thinks he is young for it to be arthritis but perhaps the mix of a sore back, incorrect work, and an acute injury to his hock all added up to a sore boy. She suggested a shot of Adequan to help him heal, in addition to the acupuncture. He clearly had sore areas in his hips and back. After the treatment his muscles were more relaxed just standing. He naturally stood square like our old Romeo. And he was moving way better even on pavement. 

Bre

Sunday was the last time I took Bre above a walk and she looked terrible. It wasn't the usual slight stiffness in her right shoulder when she has had time off. She was stiff and out of whack everywhere in the back end. It was difficult to pinpoint because she just seemed so uncomfortable. I got really serious about her massages and started back up on the Cosequin. This was a new vet to Bre and she zeroed right in on her problem areas. She found a tight spot in her right shoulder and her hips were very uneven. These are the problems every other chiro/acupuncturist find so Bre is predictable if nothing else. When we lunged her I was actually shocked that she was also 90% better than Sunday just with massage. The vet was even surprised that she looked as good as she did considering how asymmetrical her pelvis was. By the end of her session Bre was trotting out 100% sound on pavement. It was kind of amazing to see her be that much better after once session. 

Injectable Joint Medications

In the process of giving Bre's long medical history I brought up the fact that she is on Cosequin. The vet suggested using Adequan or Legend instead. I have great things about these medications but had always thoughs these options were cost prohibitive on my budget. The vet pointed out that it just seems more expensive because you put the money out all at once for a one time treatment. She said that the treatment lasts two months so the cost difference is fairly small. Because the medication is going right into the horse nothing is lost in the feed bin or through the digestive process. These were really good points. I am usually pretty logical but it really helped to have her break down the costs/benefits for me. I have been doing some riding lessons so I feel like I can justify the cost so soon after purchasing the Cosequin. The vet said I could see response as early as tomorrow. She was already looking back to normal today so it will be interested to see if she is moving even bouncier tomorrow. 

If anyone out there is feeding oral joint supplements I would suggest looking into Legend or Adequan. If you can handle doing them yourself it really cuts down the cost. Adequan is a little cheaper at about $47 a dose and Legend is $99 a dose (if you can split a large vial with someone the cost goes down to $77). If you are using Adequan for maint you will need to do several doses to get it loaded in their system you wont need to that with Legend. I will probably only need the legend every two months. The adequan would be every 6-8 weeks. Legend is a little hard to go because it is into a vein. Adequan is into a muscle and super easy to administer. 

I am excited about trying the Legend. The more I think about the idea the more I like it. It will be nice to know all the medication is getting into her and to get an immediate result. Bagging up the Cosequin to put on her feed is crazy making. I will have to do more research but this is a well respected clinic in the sport horse world so I trust them. Maybe Bre and I will make it to a show next year :) 

Poor Red Mare

Bre has had issues with soundness over the years. Initially (age 4) it was a trimming issue then she did great until I took five weeks off for a knee injury (my own) and she came back super lame (age 5). We never really figured out what it was (yes I had multiple vet opinions). I brought her back to Oregon and tried a few things that seemed to work because for the most part had a sound happy horse. She has super thin soles and I have to be really diligent about how her feet are trimmed. She has received regular chiropractic or acupuncture treatment since she was a 4yo. For about a year my friend who was in human chiro school and training to do horse chiropractic as well worked on her. Since she was hired to work at a horse/human chiropractic clinic in Boston I let Bre's body work go. It has admittedly been almost two years since she was adjusted. When Bre went lame about a month ago I immediately assumed it was feet issues. Her farrier (who is awesome) has had to let her go long twice this summer because of vacation. The horses just happen to be growing super fast this year so her angles are off on one foot. She also has chunks of dead sole coming off in patches and catching rocks in the holes. With these things in mind I just assumed he would get her all fixed up at this next shoeing.

When he arrived I let him know what was going on and he said the last time he trimmed her she had a hard time holding up her right foot because she wanted to keep weight off the left hind. I have noticed her pulling her way with the right front and took it to mean she didn't want me messing with that foot. It is hard for me to see what is going on with the rest of her body when I am the one bent over. Watching him do her shoes I could really see her tucking her hind under and shifting her weight on the hind often to get comfortable. She really didn't want to put all her weight on her hind to pick up a front foot. When he trimmed her left hind she was obviously uncomfortable. When left to her own devices she cocks up the left hind and puts more weight on the front. She has a hunters bump that I have noticed looks larger than usual.

He said she is acting similar to when he first trimmed her. Lo and behold after he first trimmed her I started intensive body work. My friend was working on her several times a month until she moved away. I also put her several scoops of cosequin a day. I ran out of cosequin in June and was planning on putting her back on it this month now that I am more financially settled after graduating from RN school. She sliced her right leg open last year and was swollen and sore for over a month. I wonder if she tweaked herself then and it just kept getting worse. Between that and a longer than usual spring abscess I am not suprised her back is sore. She's also a nut and won't walk when she's sore. She runs everywhere if it is physically possible so she doesn't give her body a chance to heal. I have a bum hip that does the same thing if I don't rest and nip it with proper chiro work. I felt terrible and guilty to see her sore. I love this mare so much my heart feels like it is going to burst so when she hurts I always feel like I should have fixed it sooner. She is the sweetest smartest girl. No one has been riding her the last month but she loves to be ridden and we have some great fall trails calling to us. I am hoping she can get back on track.

Romeo needs some work done too so I have called the vet out Thursday. My vet clinic does acupuncture work. Bre used to get acupuncture work from another vet who has since narrowed her practice down to small animal. Luckily that vet trained my equine clinic. It is nice to know whey will be able to notice if something bigger is going on. I am going to start massages on Bre tomorrow and keep on top of it over my next week off work. She loves her massages and will position herself so I am getting to the right spots.

Resolutions for 2013

Everyone is familiar with New Year Resolutions. That is when you decide to work out everyday, never eat candy again, read a new book every week, never leave dirty clothes on the floor, always be nice to your spouse in the morning..... all that stuff you forget about in a month. When it comes to horses I usually find myself thinking about goals in the fall. I am not sure why. Maybe it is because after the crazy activity of summer I start to feel more introspective as a way to balance myself. Some of it is the fact that show season starts to wrap up at the end of the summer so you look back over what you accomplished and think about where you want to go next year. Here in Oregon (and in Alaska) it is difficult to ride outside in the winter so we are often forced inside. Once inside it is nice to have some goals to look forward during those long dark days.

As you get to know me you will realize that I am against pushing young horses. They don't finish growing until 5 or 6 which means it is so easy to cause long term damage in those early years. When I round pen/lunge I keep it at 20 mins or less because all those circles aren't good on their maturing bones/ligaments. If I get on him before he is 3 it will be just to sit on him for a few minutes bareback. Once he is 3 he won't be worked very hard under saddle. I believe in short rides of 20 mins or so for those first 6 months. Slow and easy will give him a better chance at staying sound for a long time. However, I still have some goals for us! My goals for his first year under saddle won't include any statements about the quality of work I expect out of him such as "An energetic working trot, soft downward transitions, bend in the circles." I have no idea where his strengths/weaknesses will lie. And he is a baby. The only thing I expect out of him is go button, a stop button, and some level of steering. Other than that his first year will just be about experiences, not about how he performs. Soooo here are my resolutions for the next 12 months.........

1) Attend two shows before next summer. "Wait, wait" you say "He isn't even under saddle yet, are you nuts?" I am totally nuts for many reasons but not because I want to start showing him right away. We have tons of very low key schooling shows in the area. I am not worried about how he looks or what score we will get. As soon as I feel like he has go button, and brakes, I want to start taking him places. The more he can get used to showing now, the less stress it will be once I am actually a little more serious.

2) Participate in a combined training event next year at this time. Don't panic!! I won't be jumping him. There are trot a pole classes that won't require any thing that resembles a jump. He won't be jumping until he is five. It will just be a fun low key way to expose him to different types of events all in one show.

3) Ride in a clinic next summer. I have a few ideas about who I want to ride with. I am not looking for an intense clinician just yet. I would like to find someone who understands young horses. I plan to start auditing clinics this winter so I can make a good decision.

4) Go on at least two away trail rides. We have fantastic trails nearby and I can't imagine owning a horse who I can't trail ride. As comfortable as it would be just to take Bre on the rides I need to start working on the baby right away if he is to ever have a chance to live up to Bre's trail prowess.

If I find myself in one piece, with no broken bones, and a happy horse after accomplishing these goals I will feel like a winner. Ok, now to start my starvation diet so I can feel OK about white breeches. I will start right after I finish this pepsi..........

Bre's first show ten years ago when she was four. I hope Dickie is far less exciting than Bre was.

Absent Blogger

It was a crazy week. I watched Bre's barn last week. It was fun to take care of the animals but it's always disorienting to sleep away from home. Midweek I worked the last three days of orientation on my unit. For the first 6-8 weeks nurses orient to a unit with someone experienced. You are assigned the same patients and as the weeks go on the new nurses takes on the full load. From now on I will not be working with another nurse. It is all me all the time. Luckily I have an AMAZING team to work with who will help me anytime I have questions. The saying "Nurses eat their young" is true in many places but not on my unit. Every nurse there has made an effort to help me feel welcome and confident. I didn't get much done on my work days. There are pros to 12 hour shifts but they are pretty tiring. You don't get much done during work days. If I get home by 8am, crash by 9am it is 4pm before I get up. That only leave a few hours to wake up, do dishes, and make a lunch. I don't like to plan anything during that time. I like to be in a relaxed space when I get to the unit. What that all means is three straight days not going to the barn, or seeing friends. This week was particularly tiring. I had a few patients who needed me in their rooms pretty much every 15mins. That meant lots of laps up and down the hall between my computer and their rooms. I really need to wear a pedometer to see how much a walk on nights like that! I spent the last few days housesitting at my parents house. I can't wait to get back to my routine of a familiar bed, work, my honey, and the ponies.

I have a great pony week planned. Sundays have traditionally been horse days for a years. That went out the window the last year of nursing school and during the first month or so of the new job I worked almost every weekend. Now I am getting into a routine of having a few weekends off a month. I actually have every Sunday off this Sept. Tomorrow I am going to clean tack with my new horsey BFF, ride her adorable draft/appy cross. I just love her horse. She is half draft but isn't too stocky and is light on her feet.

I will be able to head out every day until Thursday to work with the big guy. I also want to work with Bre's BFF Romeo a little too this week. He has been worked western (he is built like a WP guy) and is looking hollow in the back, and scrawny in the butt. A teen was giving a lessee lessons and was very focused on what his face was doing. I want to get on him and feel what is going on. I am hoping that now the the "trainer" is off to college the girl will either take some lessons from me or from the trainer where I now have Dickie at. Some good solid dressage lessons will help build up his bum and back. I also noticed the lessee starting some bad habits with her hands. I was really bummed to see it because when I last saw her riding she was lovely. She is wonderful posture, soft/tall back, solid leg, and her elbows were bent like a pro dressage rider. She was still more of a passenger, than an active rider but at 13 she had all the tools to be a really great rider. She now has her hands back at her thighs and is seesawing and jiggling. It was such a bummer to see that. Most people have to work their tails off to get where she was naturally riding, now someone has grilled bad habits into her. Hopefully all is not lost though. I am thinking if they get out of the western saddle and do dressage and trot over some little jumps he will get moving out again and she be able to forget about fussing with his face.

I am excited to have horse projects all around. After being away from riding for so long it feels great to have horse problems to solve. I love have goal to work on. At the same time I am grateful for miss Bre. Bre has been there done that and it is heaven to have such a connection with an animal. It is nice have an animal you know inside out to fall back on.

Wonderful Horsey Day

I am pulling an all nighter to get ready to work three days in a row. It is the end of a totally perfect horsey day. I met my friend and her adorable little boy and showed her some of my fave tack spots in Portland. Then I played with Dickie who is as smart as ever. I brought a clicker and a toy with me. He figured out click=treat in about five clicks. Then I went to reserve a stall at the new barn for Oct 1st. It was just as nice as I remembered. After that I headed back for a ride on Bre. We went on a bareback jaunt through the woods and I ended up tearing my t-shirt in half because I misjudged the hieght of some branches on a game trail. I was so happy that I didn't run into anyone on the ride back because they would have been blinded by the white skin on my back fat. It was a long day and I am sore from all the walking and riding but I feel great.

I took a few pics from the new barn's website so you can see new digs. I officially gave notice today. The current owner was so nice about it. She understood my reasons. I might be able to leave before the 30 days because someone just called about a stall recently. If the other person still needs a stall I can move before Oct 1st.

The day started with wishful window shopping. What a heavenly sight, rows and rows of consignment saddles......

Dickie's stall looks just like this (I think his shares a wall).... 

His stall is the second from the end. The one next to the horse peeking out. 

I took this one today. It is of his personal run attached to his stall. I had already walked a ways before I took the picture, if that gives you any idea of the size. It goes all the way to the far fence. There is rock/gravel just outside the door so it probably won't get too muddy :)  He gets to be out 24/7. YAY!!!

This is of the round pen the built last year. It is so nice. It is all wood so there are no worries of a frisky kick resulting in a leg through the fence. 

Finished product.....

 Enough about what the pony gets. I get one of these wondeful tack lockers You can walk into the locker and stand up by barely scrunching. 

Just Photos

Today was the first day I got to play with my boy without the cardiology appointment looming in the future. My horsey friend came out today and helped me get some photos. By the time she arrived I had been working him for quite awhile and his baby brain didn't want to stand still. I still think he looks pretty darn stunning though :)

Hi mom, got any treats?

Standing in the cross ties like a pro. He just got in trouble for letting his paint friend chew on his side. 

Today he worked on lunging and wore a surcingle for the first time. He was a champ!!

Giving a sweet face so no one will remember he just tried to eat the lead rope. 

Me trying to get a good side view. Dickie making a disgusted face because he would rather eat grass. 

Cute wittle baby face peeking in to see Dickie. 

Sharing grooming time with the neighbor baby. They removed the top fence rung earlier. 

Mom wants the shoulder scratches to herself. 

View of his field from one end to the other. He can get through the fence all the way to the trees in the distance. 

Above and Beyond Full Care

I started the new job recently and finally moved from hours of boring computer training to actually caring for patients last Weds. It was really marvelous and I am so grateful to have found such a rewarding career. The job market for new nurses in Portland is currently very difficult and I can't believe that I was offered the best possible job before I had even graduated.  I had initially thought I would work in inpatient psych but to be a well rounded nurse I really need some general med/surg under my belt. I have landed on the most wonderful unit. I love complicated, a fast pace, and feeling part of a team. The nurses on the transplant unit are amazing. Kind, funny, quirky, and patient.  And I can't tell you what a privilege it is to share my patients journey through wherever life might take them.

After working two day shifts I was given a full week off to get my body used to graveyards. I am progressively staying up later each night so I will be sharp by the time I get to work on Friday. I had grand plans of spending every day playing with my ponies this week but a summer cold ruined my party. I woke up Friday morning covered in snot like a 2 yo, then spent Saturday moaning dramatically on the couch. At this point I am at least not whining with every move but I am still coughing up upleasant things so I haven't made it out to the stable. It is times like these that I feel extra lucky to have found such great stables.

Bre lives at a private home with a big stall, run at night, a sexy boyfriend named Romeo, and acres of pasture during the day. As if that isn't good enough the family loves her like ther own. I think that Bre loves them more than me and I am 100% fine with that. They feed her treats, kiss her on the nose, tell her how pretty she is, and ride her. She loves the whole family from the kids, to the adults, to the dog, and the chickens. From the day she walked out of the trailer she acted like she had always been there and owned the place. She just got herself a young lady to lease her and thinks Maddie is the cats meow. When she decides someone is part of her herd she will do anything for them. It makes me feel so good that even when I am sick, working 12 hours shifts (or non existant during 2 years of RN school) Bre is spoiled. I am always shocked when Bre still comes running to me with a nicker because she has it so good when I am not there :)

I am happy to say that Dickie has landed at a wonderful barn too. He lives just a few blocks down a private drive from Bre and a boarding stable. There are only six boarders, an indoor arena, big stall with a nice run, and acres of pasture during the day. He has three boys he goes out with. Harley is his very best friend. Harley is a chestnut paint and whenever I go out there the two are joined at the hip. The only complaint I have is that he has gone through several fly masks. The daily entertainment is for Harley to take off his fly mask then they carry it around together like a trophy (if anyone has tips on keeping masks on naughty boys please share!!). The BO loves Dickie enough to look for it but finally the rascals managed to hide the last one. The BO is amazing. She gives Dickie love and has been texting me photos and updates while I am sick. She is used to big youngsters (her last horse was a 17Hander who she raised from a baby) so I trust her completely. She has been working with him on leadrope manners and said he is a gentelmen. By all accounts he is being well behaved and everyone loves him. Apparently part of his routine is to come into the pasture closest to the barn to visit whenever people are around so she leaves the paddock gate open so he can get into the barn for social hour. I think it is adorable that he will make his way through the maze of the big pastures, through the dry lot next to the barn, find the one paddock that is open, and go into a stall just to hang his head in and see what the people are doing.

I think when we are looking at barns we should always take into account our weaknesses as owners. One of mine is that realistically I can't be out there every day. Even now that I am out of school I will be working 12 hour shifts. I will have stretches of time off but there will be days when I can't make it out because I am catching up on sleep. I know that about my lifestyle so I have found places that my horses will be happy in whether I make it out or not. They get to be out with other horses and play so their little minds keep busy. I feel incredibly lucky that they have barn owners who love on them even though I know "full care" doesn't mean they are expected to dote on them. But dote on them they do, and no words can express how thankful I am for their type of full care.

I can't wait to get out there tomorrow and at least get some nose kisses in.

My Pride and Joy

In the hubbub of worries over the new boy, Bre has been lost in the shadows. I spent some time with her in the sun and was reminded how everything feels right in the world as soon as I get on her. I have been riding Bre since she was three and owned her since she was four. That means we have been together for 11 years. I know how she is going to move before she does it. She knows what I am asking her to do as soon as I think it. I am so proud of her. The horse she has become is one of my greatest accomplishments. She was the greenest horse I had worked with and there were days when I would come home and cry to my old trainer who was 1,000 miles away because I didn't think I could do it. She couldn't canter with a rider without feeling like she was going to fall over or hit a wall. Lunging consisted of a panicked flight around the arena if you even touched the whip. She flipped her head and sometimes reared when I tried to take up contact because she had been started with a wire twist in a german martingale. If you told her "No" too loud on the ground she would rear up, paw her legs like a wild mustang, and take off running. She kicked two people sending one to the hospital and leaving the other with a horse shoe shaped scar in her muscle that she still has today. I remember when I first started working with her and was brushing her in her stall. Someone came up to me and told me that I shouldn't be in that stall because Bre was too dangerous. Oh, and she colicked. Alllllllll the time. She colicked with her old owners for over two days and pulled out of it just before they decided to euthanize her. I was up for 2 days walking her, checking on her every 15 minutes to make sure she wasn't thrashing, administering IV medications, and begging for her to pull through. Her tummy problems continued but slowly decreased with changes on her diet and  lifestyle she finally had a colic free year 5 years ago. Then there was the mystery lameness.......... no one really knows what caused it at about age 5. Sometimes she still is a little off in the right shoulder but it depends on who is riding her and if she wants to do what they are asking. We can't forget the squishy feet that love to give her a yearly abscess just when it is time to dust off the riding boots and get outside.

Somehow through all of that she has blossomed into an amazing horse. She is the kind of horse you can jump on after 6 months of sitting in a field and take for a 2 hour trail ride. She will run when you ask her to run (and beat anything on four legs) but walk the second you want it.  She is incredibly soft in the bridle and like a rubber band when you ask her to bend. She is pretty close to bombproof. I say pretty close because she hates bicycles with a passion. You can walk under her  or stand on her back. Honey badger don't care just so long as there is a treat in the equation. She packs kids around like she is carrying eggs shells even though her usual motto is "why walk when you can run there." Case in point there was a fundraiser at the stable for a young boy with autism last week. My spunky mare walked around with her head down taking tiny little steps for all the kids who wanted pony rides. Then she tore it up in the afternoon with the teenagers who volunteered that day.

It made my heart happy to ride her today with no reins. We did ten meter circles and serpentine at the walk and trot. Then I got to watch the people who take care of her ride my pretty shiny penny. Sometimes I can't believe that the fire breathing dragon horse I met 11 years ago is the same horse. When I first saw her I thought she was the ugliest thing I had ever seen. Thin tail, skinny inverted neck, no muscle, was like riding a jackhammer, had no concept that leg means go. But I knew that horses aren't born knowing what to do under saddle so I decided to see how far she could go.  Harsh bits, harsh words, and a hard hand hadn't helped her learn how to be a good equine citizen. How she managed to get past all of that baggage and become this lovely trustworthy creature will always be somewhat of a mystery to me. If Bre can walk through all that pain and still forgive and love then so should all of us. Thank you Bre for reminding me of how precious life is and making me proud to be part of your transformation.

PS- Remember how much I love you when you see that your grain has been cut in half tomorrow.

Summer Lovin'

Tomorrow the new job starts and my brief four day vacation ends. I had plenty of things I needed to get done today. Laundry to fold, lunches for the week, paperwork, bills to pay etc...... My plan had been to arrive at the stable to play with Dickie at 8am for a quick lesson in manners then hop on the big red mare. I ended up devoting the whole day to horses. When I arrived he melted my heart once again with his cute face reaching out the stall door to say "hi". I came with my stethoscope hoping to listen to his heart now that I have done a little more reading. I wanted to hear if it was occurring between S1 and S2 like I remembered and if it got louder or had the same intensity throughout the murmur. If it gets louder then quieter it is more likely to be harmless. If it has the same intensity throughout (holosytlolic) it could be mitral valve regurgitation which isn't good. I also wanted to put him to work a little and see if that changed what I was hearing. The last time I checked I wasn't an equine cardiologist so I know everything is speculation but I am not one to do nothing when I can obsess and stress myself out. It sounds like it is definitely from the end of S1 to S2 and is probably holosystolic (same intensity throughout). It doesn't change with work. I really can't wait to get the cardiologist out so he can hopefully tell me I am wrong. I called my vet and they still don't have all the details about how soon I can get him in (should call tomorrow) but they said it can be anywhere from tomorrow or months from now.

Once I got my moping out of the way we set to work to have a fun day. We went into the indoor arena to work on moving his shoulder away from me. His is marvelous about backing up and moving his hips but his shoulder always seems to be running right into me. Attached to his shoulder is his leg, and at the end of his leg is his big heavy HOOF. We have discovered the hard way that ramming his shoulder into me also tends to correspond with my foot under his hoof. When he is calm and not worried about anything he is the perfect gentleman but the second the sheep go running or the pomeranians start yapping I feel the sharp pain of a 1,000 lbs on my foot.

I let him wander around the arena a little first just to sniff everything and decide it was ok. Then we went to work. We started with what he seems to do well, picking up his feet, backing up, forehand turns, and getting face scratches. Next we worked on moving his shoulder. He decided that was very hard and reminded me he is only two with a hop up on his hind legs and attempt at biting me. Then he immediately stood still and put his head up against me like I would forget he was naughty if he was cute enough. Oddly enough the temper tantrum put a big grin on my face. The day before the vet had wondered if maybe he was so calm because his heart wasn't giving him enough oxygen. Today he was acting like a typical 2 yo boy wanting to throw a fit because he couldn't get his way. As soon as he got the idea I ended our session and went to see how he does in the cross ties. I like my horses to stand still even without the cross ties so we worked on that. He was a perfect gentlmen (thank you to Pony Up and the Reeves' for that). I spent the next few hours riding my mare and watching the 4-H fair a few minutes away.

At about 130pm I thought it would be fun to walk Dickie up to where Bre lives and have another short session. I also wanted to show him off to visitors at Bre's barn. I was so impressed I was beaming. When I made it down it Dickie's barn he saw me coming from the field and left his yummy grass to meet me in the barn. How many horses will leave their buddies and a field of lush grass just to see what the people are up to? I had been sure that I was going to have a hard time catching him. I was even more proud on our walk up. He saw the sheep and little yappy dogs and really wanted to jump on top of me but seemed to remember our lessons. When we got up to the outdoor arena I worked on having him trot when I ran, walked when I walked, and stopping as soon as I stopped. When I took off running he planted his feet firmly in the ground and refused to take one step. He looked at me like he thought I had lost my mind. Bre was watching all of this I am sure with amusement because I have done so many crazy things to her than nothing seems to phase her anymore. After a few times of bolting forward he got the idea that he has to stick with my pace no matter what. Our walk home was a little more eventful because the yappy dogs were actually outside and several cars drove by but I am happy to say that my feet arrived back at entirely unscathed today.

Here are just a few of the reasons why I love this horse:

1) He is crazy smart. He has been with me for less four days and every day he picks up where he left off.
2) He is curious. He is always watching what is going on around him. He is aware of the sheep, the dogs, the neighbor lady on her tractor. He calmy inspects every inch of the arena.
3) He doesn't panic. Even when he sees something that is terrifying he doesn't bolt or get dangerous. He might tell you he things something Will eat him by planting his feet for a second but then he will walk right by it.
4) He loves people. He frequently leaves other horses or food because he wants to see what we are up to. He comes up to you in the field or sticks his head out of his stall.
5) He is dramatic. I know this sounds silly but I like a horse with some drama or spunk. When given a poke in the side to move over he just has to occasionally bit the air (not even in my direction) in disgust. After throwing someone's helmet on the ground he spooked himself so hard he almost when down on his knees.
6) He is gorgeous from the curved ears, to the delicate nose, to the spots on his rump, to the big bones in his legs.
7) He thinks it is funny to throw anything he can get his teeth on. Brushes, things sitting on the arena rail (see above), halters, fly masks. I don't know what is wrong with me but I love some naughty in my horses.

I am going to post this grammar and spelling errors alike. I thought I should get it out just because it ended on a positive note and I want to get the positive energy flowing!!!

Big Changes

Next week will be a big week. I start a new job working at a major medical center here in Portland with my shiny new RN license. I currently work there in inpatient psych and decided that it would be best for my long term career to work do something other than psych for a few years. I have worked in psych for over a decade now and see myself growing old and grey in that field. However, I know that building up my general medical knowledge will be so important and will open me up to many opportunities. Having a well rounded background will make it easier for me to get a job should my partner and I ever decide to move elsewhere. It will also allow me to do outreach work in other countries. And most importantly it will make me a better nurse practitioner once I decide to go to grad school. The new job will be taking care of people receiving kidney and liver transplants. It is a challenging area of nursing which is very exciting to me. I can't wait to get started!!! The position will be working graveyard. This shift makes me both excited and terrified. I will earn significantly more money, which is a huge pro. My goal over the next year is to take my partner on a tropical trip, buy a house, and take care of my ponies. The pace will also be slower which will allow me to really get to know my patients and do research about their needs while at work. I love a fast pace but I plan on using down time to learn as much as I can as fast as I can. I think once I get used to it this is going to be a wonderful shift for me in my first year of nursing. 

Working overnights isn't without worries for me though. I have bipolar disorder, which has been very stable for years. Since I have been to Oregon I haven't had more than minor dips in my mood in the winter and before that I was stable as well. I know that I will be able to get sleep working graves because I tend to sleep better during the days anyway. I do worry that I will sleep away the days and not get enough light. That was a big problem for me in AK and I still get down in the winters here. I worry that I won't be motivated to do anything when I get up because I am on such a strange schedule. Luckily I will soon have a special weapon in my back pocket. A big 16h four legged weapon. One thing I know about myself is that I will always get up and be motivated if I have a pony depending on me. No matter how down I feel I find a way to work with my horse. Riding is the one thing that will pull me through on the darkest days. Better yet riding usually keeps me on an even keel so things never get dark and sad. It gives me structure, it keeps my mind busy, and motivates me to eat healthier and exercise. Nursing is a stressful career. The 12 hour days, sick and upset patients, working weird hours and missing out on sunlight. It might seem insane to add an extra expense/stress to the mix with a young horse. I know myself though and know that this will make me a better person through it all. I will be in better shape to go on hikes and trips with my honey. I will be more sane and able to pick up extra shifts. And I will just be happier all around. 

There will soon be more to come on this guy :)

Journeys

The saga of Bre's feet continues. The vet came out today because she has been lame since last Weds. We thought that Bre was going to have her first year with no abscesses but it is looking like she foiled my plans to start riding her again. She heard all my hollering about becoming a registered nurse and decided she was not ready to come out of retirement. I worried about her all weekend. It is so hard to know when to call the vet. Her abscesses generally pop in 3-5 days and I decided to call since she wasn't getting better. Of course today when I called her in from the pasture she comes trotting up almost 100% sound. Looks like a few days of having a diaper and duct tape on her hoof did the trick. Too bad that she didn't pull out of it before the vet was called. It was still peace of mind to have a professional look at her and agree with my assessment. 

Looking at Bre today I started feeling sentimental about our journey together. I have finally truly accepted that Bre will not be the show horse that I had hoped for one day. I know I wouldn't trade my years with her for a second though. I have learned so much about myself through training her. I have learned how to push forward when I am so scared that I want to squeal and run. I know that I can find answers to problems I didn't even know existed. I think, more than any the "book smarts" I have, the confidence and problem solving skills I honed training Bre make me a better nurse and mental health worker. There were so many times when I should have been terrified over a big exam, skills test, or new clinical site but I told myself "If you can survive a 1,200 lb horse trying to flip over on you this is no big deal." So much of who I am today has been built by what I have done with horses. As much as I love Bre though I miss riding seriously so much it aches sometimes. I dream about riding, being in clinics, and jumping a course. I miss going into the arena every day and having a problem to solve. I miss that rush of figuring out a way to teach my horse a new skill. Because of this I am very excited to be adopting a horse so I can start back on that journey. It has been so hard not having a horse to work with. Bre is amazing and so well trained that it takes three rides to get her back to where we left off years ago. Then we can't go any further because both emotionally and physically it is too hard for Bre. 

On a happy note Bre had a young gal come out to ride her last week. I have been hoping to find a lease on Bre to help out with care and provide her some love. Bre loves to be ridden and I still like to take her on trail rides. It will be great to have someone to keep her fit enough that I can take her on a trail ride and not have her huffing and puffing. The new rider won't push her as much as I would in the arena. She will be perfect. 

Bre is more than capable of taking this gal along as far as she wants to go until she graduates from HS. She is well trained, has a good mind, is close to bomb proof, and loves attention. She used to jump but isn't looking for anything serious. If she decided to be more serious Bre could easily do some low cross rail classes and school up to 1st level dressage. When she came out to ride her I was holding my breath because Bre is really fussy about who she wants to ride her. She just had someone come out and Bre wouldn't go, wouldn't steer, or would walk like a drunkard. If someone gets on her and doesn't ride with their seat/legs or is trying to push her forward with their legs but is saying stop with their seat she balks. I can't even count on my fingers how many people have tried this mare only to get off in disgust. I knew from the second this young lady got on her that Bre loved her. Bre went ride into fancy show horse mode and was mellow as could be. I am thrilled that finally Bre will have a person to lease her. The girl was calm, listened to what Bre had to say, picked up on cues from Bre, and was so soft with her body.

Things feel like they are coming full circle. I have graduated from nursing school, have the most amazing partner ever, have someone to help with my Breedle, and a new project pony.